Life. Love. Family. My Perfect Imperfection.

Friday, January 31, 2014

this...

Sometimes, you just have to walk away from things that are causing more problems than they are helping. By doing so, you can commit more fully to the people and things that mean the most to you and have been there the longest - for me, that's my husband and my boys.

It sounds like an excuse, but it's so much more than that.
When I decided to start being a Beachbody Coach, I didn't discuss it with Jason. I just jumped right in, with both feet. Now, while it may be a great fit for some people, I've struggled with it. I want to help people, help them get healthy and fit, learn to eat right, all the while doing the same for myself. But I feel like a.) nobody is interested or b.) nobody can afford to buy the workouts and/or shakes. Now I know what other coaches will say: It's not about selling. I get that, but to an extent it is. They need to find a workout that is their soul-mate workout, and there are so many good choices and the shakes are super healthy, but most people I know though just can't do it. I'm not good at reaching out to new people, either.  Not only has it been stressing me out, because I don't know what/how/who, even with my awesome team's help (it's truly not about them, it's all about what I can and can't do, handle and control), but we have been spending money on our own shakes as well as our business fees. This has caused some budgetary concerns - minor, but very real.

After the first of the year, our insurance went up, as did the 401k  deductions, and we are trying to save some money for some home improvements we want to do as well as other things. One more reason to cut expenses.

I am trying not to think of this as quitting or giving up on something, so much as re-prioritizing. Things need to change and this is where they can. We needed to take a long hard look at things, and really step back. I choose them, over ANYTHING else.

My commitment has been and always will be, first and foremost, to the love of my life, Jason, and our 3 sons, Ethan, Alex, and Jack. When I sat down and spoke with Jason about quitting being a coach, and my why's, we discussed openly and came to the conclusion that it's what's right for our whole family, because I'm struggling with it.

 Chains do not hold a marriage together.  It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years.  ~Simone Signoret
I love this quote, because for me those threads are our conversations, our fights, our compromises, our willingness to fight for one another and for our family unit.

I love being married.  It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.  ~Rita Rudner
 
I hope I don't annoy him too much, and even when he annoys me, I love him more than life.

What needs changing in YOUR life today? For me, it's hunkering down into our family more, and shutting out the world just a bit, while still sharing, growing, loving, and moving on from things that just don't fit. I'm thankful for the opportunity I had, and am not sorry I attempted. I did learn things, and will always be grateful for that. I feel like I've made some new friends along the way and reconnected with old acquaintances, too.

On to bigger and better things. Like my eldest son's school spelling bee in an hour. Yes, that's right, E won the class bee again this year, and goes to the next level. If he wins, it will be the charter school bee and possibly the Scripps regional bee again. Even if he doesn't make it, I'm proud of him and Alex for all their hard work in school. (Alex was disappointed because he didn't win his class bee, but he was happy for his good friend that did :) ) Oh, and of course, my writing, online and offline. I have had some book ideas floating around in my head for months now, and while they might not be any good at all, I need to get them on paper and share with someone...

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